How To Politely "Break Up" With Your Hair Stylist

Going to the salon is as much a professional service as it is a social experience, especially in the South where we often gossip with friends under the heat lamp, go to the same salon for decades, and make friends with our stylists. While there’s certainly a list of etiquette dos and don’ts at the hair salon, having your best experience comes down to knowing how to interact with your stylist in a way that will make it enjoyable for both parties. Despite how important we view Southern hospitality and friendliness, things can get dicey if you’re no longer happy with your hair stylist. Here's how to handle “breaking up” with your hair stylist, the polite Southern way. 

What Causes A “Breakup” With A Stylist?

More often than not, it is not one drastic occurrence that causes a “stylist breakup” between a client and hairdresser. Sometimes, it is simply because you no longer love how your hair looks after getting cut or color services and don’t feel as though you and the stylist are on the same page about what you’re looking for or what your expectations are. However, it is important to note that communication is important, and the best way to navigate a stylist-client relationship is to make sure you have been realistic and descriptive about what you’re desiring—and also honest when your hair has not turned out to your liking, as politely as possible.

If you feel that you have been communicating efficiently and there is still a divide or loss of compatibility with your stylist, it might be time to move on. The hair salon is a service-based business, so consider what is making you unhappy or uncomfortable and if it is worth staying on the same course. 

When It’s Time To Switch Stylists

If it seems that there is breakdown in communication or a pattern of unsatisfactory appointments, it might be time to consider switching up your approach and trying a new hair stylist. Sometimes, you might just find that you’ve simply outgrown each other, and there should be no hard feelings on either side about moving on. Moreover, if your hair stylist has seemingly changed in demeanor in a way that doesn’t foster a good client-stylist relationship, you aren’t under obligation to “make it work,” and most stylists do not take it too harshly if clients move onto another professional that fits their needs better. 

How To Switch Hair Stylists Politely

Try Addressing Concerns First

Before taking the final step of switching hair stylists, make sure you’ve thoroughly communicated at each service what you’re looking for and politely brought up any issues with the results or services. Most often, your stylist will be happy to fix any issue without any awkwardness. However, if you’ve noticed a pattern of unsatisfactory appointments despite constant communication, it might be time to officially consider other options. 

Slowly Transition Out 

While it may seem awkward to simply “ghost” your hair stylist, odds are it should not come as a shock to your stylist if you stop booking appointments after noting past unsatisfactory services. While it can feel as though it will be taken impolitely, especially in small towns where there are fewer stylists and salons, just remember that it is very common for people to switch stylists, and neither client or stylist should take it personally. 

Have a Conversation

If you’ve had a long relationship with your stylist, you might feel behooved to have a conversation before stopping appointments altogether. While it might seem awkward, it can help both parties feel better overall about the situation afterwards. Just keep it simple and polite, stating that despite no hard feelings or ill will, you think it will be best to see another stylist moving forward. Wish them well, and thank them for their services to date.  

Don’t Avoid Them

If you stop seeing a hair stylist, be prepared to perhaps still see them around, particularly if you live in a small town, are in the same acquaintance group, or keep going to the same salon. As with any other situation, etiquette dictates that you do not avoid them, which can make things awkward or suggest a falling out. Instead, give a polite hello. It will always be appreciated, even if it feels uncomfortable for a second. 

Do You Need To Switch Salons? 

It might seem surprising, but you do not have to switch salons if you're otherwise very happy with it, especially if you do not have many options in your area. As noted, most times there are no hard feelings from your hair stylist if you simply are no longer a good fit together. If you handled the “break up” politely, there should be no reason you have to switch salons unless it is your preference. However, make sure not to awkwardly avoid your ex-stylist on salon trips. A friendly wave or quick greeting should suffice. 

“Bad” Reasons To Break Up With A Hair Stylist 

Your Expectations Are Not Realistic 

It’s important to note that you cannot fault a stylist if you are asking for something that the stylist cannot provide due to your natural hair texture, color, length, and other factors. However, in the spirit of communication, he or she should outline why or how your expectations differ from what is possible with your hair type before providing the service. For example, if you have fine hair, but are asking for a super textured cut, you might ask the stylist how you can achieve a similar result. 

It Was a Fluke Mistake

Always make sure to immediately point out if your cut or color does not match up to your expectations, or if there was something wrong with the service. Ultimately, your hair stylist wants you to be happy and confident with the result, and you can offer the opportunity for him or her to fix the issue before walking away permanently, especially if you’ve otherwise had a good relationship and experience with your hair stylist.